Growth and Limitation

So many people get overly excited about the things that they can "change", but rarely is the same excitement seen around the things they "cannot change".

I'm personally more excited about the things I cannot change, as growth becomes more focussed, when one realises one's own limitations.

Perhaps in some ways, the things that one can 'change', most of the time, are less likely to lead to growth, and are more likely to lead to being lead in circles.

Bad habits more readily fall away when one realises the limitations of them, when I realised the limitation of drinking alcohol, it lost all its appeal for example, and now I could never go back to drinking it.

It's similar with people, friends were my greatest attachment, but then I realised the limitations of them, and they too lost their appeal, now I can never feel dependant on the promise of what they represent again. I thought about that the other day, how I will never again feel the same way I used to feel where my friends were the entire universe, and the most central part of my attention and awareness. I used to only feel "complete" when engaged in conversation with friends I was stimulated in an excitable way with. In the Gemini way.

Now that excitement, is not with friends, which is good because it was illusory anyway, just some product of nervous energy that had built up within me, out of my social ineptitude and inability to face my own suffering.

Now when I interact with others, there is less selfishness there, because I'm less likely to want to try and turn them into my personal entertainment or feel good drug.